EP255: Healing the Masculine & Feminine Energy in Biz & Life

lauren of love podcast Feb 15, 2022

Today’s episode is about unifying masculine structure and feminine flow so they can work in harmony. Both of these energies exist within all of us. For some, theres a more dominant energy, but sometimes these energies get super unbalanced and out of whack. These energies and how we use them is super important for prosperity, freedom, and abundance. If we lean too much onto the masculine, we can experience burnout and fatigue while if we lean too much on the feminine, we lose structure and stability. 


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In my first year of business, I hired a coach with great knowledge on these two frequencies. One of the first things he had me do was to go to the bank, take out a large amount money, and put the cash on my desk, and put it on the left side of my desk (feminine is left, masculine is right). This was to represent my openness to accepting and receiving money. I didn’t understand masculine and feminine before working with him, but he laid the foundation for me to realize that getting outcomes wasn’t just about working hard and having the right strategies, but also being in alignment with my feminine energy. 


So, let’s understand these two frequencies and how they exist in our lives. 


The masculine and feminine operate very differently. Masculine energy is focused on outcome, while feminine energy is focused on creativity and support for the bigger picture. When the masculine energy is in overdrive, we have to replenish and nurture to avoid burnout. One of the ways to do this is by doing nothing. YUP.  A lot of women have a problem doing this because we have been raised to feel as if we always have to be doing something. If we don’t honor the need to replenish the masculine, we can get tapped out pretty easily, especially when we overdo the masculine in our business. We have to be able to evaluate our energetic frequencies and set boundaries.


So, how do we know our masculine is wounded?


For me, I was achieving for validation, success & recognition. I didn’t have a healthy sense of worthiness or alignment. I was using the masculine to feel good enough and that is not a healthy relationship. I was exhausted but I wasn’t feeling what I wanted to feel.


And on the other hand, the feminine is really about being in the place of flow and experience, indulging in the pleasures of life. So many of us disconnect from our feminine because we are raised in a patriarchal structure where achievement and outcome is desired, not free flow. This relates to business because if the masculine is in overdrive and we don’t honor our feminine, the focus in your business is probably not what feels soul aligned or good for you to build, but what will bring you money and success. This can be so detrimental to business because it is the feminine that allows for sustainability of achievement. If what you are doing doesn’t feel good to you, you are going to build something that feels unaligned. You need the excitement and joy of the perspective of the feminine. 


Now, how we combine these two energies is REALLY important. I’ve always said that masculine energy is the structure that keeps the feminine safe. If you are always in your feminine, you get nothing done. When the feminine is in overdrive, we don’t allow ourselves to be consistent or dedicated to structure, strategy, or discipline. The products may be soul aligned, but there is no strategy that allows for success. 


The masculine allows for time freedom when you have a structure for your business and containers for your schedule, tasks, and launches. One of the ways I honor my masculine, is making a list on Sunday night of what I need to finish for the upcoming week. Once I have these tasks, I look at my calendar and my coaching schedule, and then decide where I will place the other tasks I wrote that need to be completed. Having this structure allows me to be in my feminine energy while I work so there can be creativity and free flow.


When I was having a hard time honoring this, I would work and push without taking the pause to replenish myself. I would get exhausted and take such long pauses of disconnect that were dysfunctional for my business. To fix this, I come into every start of a task in my business with a feminine opening and then complete it with a closing. For me, I start by setting the vibe (oil diffusing, salt lamp, feather work, etc.) I’ll show up and do my work and then I’ll do activities that show myself that I’m shutting down (turning off the lamp, shut off the diffuser, cleanse my space). 


If you lack creative inspiration or don’t have a flow of ideas, this can be a sign of a disconnected or wounded feminine. For me, I would get a download and instantly doubt and judge myself and my ideas. Eventually, this thought process lead me to receiving any downloads at all. There was no inspiration or connection. Since feminine is an energy of being, if we don’t honor the practices and rituals of knowing how to be, we won’t be in a place to receive the brilliance of intuition. If we don’t create space in the day to be with ourselves and honor our feminine, we will be disconnected from our internal knowings. To embrace my feminine, I love a good feminine ritual. Baths, time in nature, crafting, doing what FEELS GOOD! 


We have to hold ourselves accountable to rewrite our relationship with our masculine and feminine energies inside AND outside of our businesses. We have to find comfort in both structure and flow. We have to accept learning something new and easing through the discomfort of new processes.